For those of you are brave enough to describe the above picture with words, it’s caption time!

Bonus points if you can find Lisandro in this picture.

Just some random odds and ends for you to read as you bide your time waiting for Lyon’s Champions League clash with Liverpool.

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<— Sid’s Serious Captain-y Face.

If you’re wondering why the captain’s armband showed up on Cris last Saturday, despite Sidney Govou also being on the pitch, it’s because our dear (former?) captain was seen drunk in public only two nights before the derby. He was at the Grand Prix de tennis de Lyon (part of the ATP World Tour, for you tennis junkies) with Remy Vercoutre, Florent Laville, and Sylvain Wiltord, another ex-Lyon bad boy. Sadly, pictures of a wasted Govou have yet to circulate on the internet (damn French media – in England they have no scruples about this sort of thing), but video tapes have made their way to Claude Puel’s desk.

Puel wasn’t very happy and took away Govou’s armband, though no word yet on whether this is a permanent change. Puel was pragmatic enough to realize that captain or not, Govou was needed on the pitch, which is why he was in the starting XI against St. Etienne. For Puel, it seems the matter is closed, but Jean-Mimi naturally had more to say. While he did say that Govou is willing to make amends, Aulas also called his leadership abilities into question and said that he’d consider Govou’s punishment carefully. Aulas met with him on Sunday to discuss the situation with him.

I guess this probably seems like an overreaction from Lyon, but given Govou’s hard partying history – and don’t forget that he was arrested for drunk driving less than a year ago – it’s no surprise that the club is so concerned.

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Just for lulz.

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I was going to write about the latest blow to French football’s eternal quest for equality on the global markets, but since Xavier of the Lens Offside has already done such an excellent job in telling us why getting rid of the DIC is really bad news for Ligue 1, I figure, why reinvent the wheel?

Aulas is desperately sounding the alarm. According to him, this change will mean that Lyon lose an extra €6m a year. It doesn’t seem like a lot, at least on the surface, but keep in mind that France already has really strict rules on club finances. Aulas fears that he may not be able to offer extensions to Sidney Govou, Francois Clerc, and other players nearing the ends of their contracts.

Also, here is a great interview (in English!) of Jean-mimi on UEFA.com.

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Kader Keita is the latest ex-OL player to accuse the club of mistreating him. Honestly, all these disgruntled former players make Lyon sound like an abusive ex-husband. Should I be more disturbed?

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I have so much love for these two. Bafe and Lisandro are this, but without the ~dramah~.

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The two latest recruits at Lyon are Norwegian pair Christine Colombo Nilsen and Isabell Hervolsen Both women left Kolbotn for OL Féminines, though their transfer fee remains undisclosed. They were signed just in time for them to be eligible for the club’s CL match against Fortuna Hjørring. Along with Arsenal and Bayern Munich, Lyon are one of three clubs that are still represented in both the men’s and women’s UEFA Champions League. Let’s hope that one of them actually win the damn trophy this time.

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The spot for a third blogger on the Lyon Offside still remains open. John and I post when we can, but I know many of you would prefer more frequent updates. If you think you can post at least once a week, have decent grammar, and are such a diehard fan that you want to share your love of OL with the rest of the world, please read this post.

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Phrase of the day week month: “The unstoppable groin-pocalypse going on at Lyon….What in the name of Cleber’s crotch is going on here?” Found on Dirty Tackle.

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Most of the major roadblocks in the development of OL Land have been removed, as 74% of the population of Greater Lyon are in favor of the new stadium. The biggest obstacle has had to do with the construction of more public transportation to the Decines area, or more accurately, the funding of that new transportation. Right now, there is one dinky tram line that goes out there, which is not enough to support the amount of people expected to utilize public transportation to get to the games (which is estimated at 65%). Some citizens don’t want the city to take on the added burden of these costs (OL wouldn’t be paying for it as it’s the city’s expense), though others argue that the area has long been in need of new train lines regardless, and that the increased revenue to the businesses in the area would make up for the expenses.

In any case, Aulas expects the final plans to be approved this spring, and that applications for the building permits will be completed by fall next year. The expected date of the new stadium is December 8th, 2013.

Lyon have also launched a new website that will keep everyone up to date with the latest news and pictures of the stadium. The site is chock full of interesting stuff, like details about the stadium’s eco-friendly design, the transportation and traffic surveys, a map showing all the sites of interest, and information on how the stadium will be funded (€450m from OL and its private partners and an additional €180m from public funds for transportation purposes).

The architectural firm chosen by Aulas is Populous (formerly HOK Architecture). They have a lot of impressive projects to their name, so we can expect good things from them.

And of course, the photos. I don’t think I’ve posted these pictures before. If you want to see the other pics I’ve posted of the new stadium, just click of the “OL Land/New Stadium” category on the right.

(click to enlarge)

The biggest news is the medical update on Bafetimbi Gomis. Two days ago at Guingamp, Gomis collapsed during practice with the France squad. He was out for a minute or two but revived enough to walk out of the field. He apparently felt fine afterward, and though the team doctor insisted he stay off his feet for the rest of the day – and though his fellow players were scared shitless – he’s been cleared to go back to full training today.

Gomis periodically suffers from Vasogoval episodes, which is a malaise of the vagus nerve. Certain situations can trigger attacks, which is stress, in Gomis’s case. Jean-Michel Aulas raised the red flag stating how alarmed he is over Gomis’s health – this is his third attack since joining Lyon – but Emmanuel Ohrant, OL’s club doctor, says that Gomis is just fine. His health is carefully monitored, and he does not have any heart problems, which is the number one worry in these situations. He undergoes frequent medical checkups, and so far, the club is satisfied with the state of his health. Ohrant even points out that not only were Lyon aware of this issue before they signed Gomis, but that St. Etienne knew about it before they offered him a pro contract, so it is clearly not that much cause for concern.

All the same, it’s still scary to think about, especially when footballer deaths seem to be occurring on an almost yearly basis. While I do trust both OL and Le Bleus when they say that Gomis is fine, it’ll take a long time before this picture is wiped from my memory.

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Here is a quick run down of all the international action involving OL players.

France (vs. Faroe Islands – 10/10/09, vs. Austia – 10/14/09): Jeremy Toulalan, Hugo Lloris, Sidney Govou, Bafetimbi Gomis.

France U21 (vs. Netherlands – 10/09/09, vs. Belgium(h) – 10/12/09, vs. Belgium (a) – 10/14/09): Clement Grenier, Yannis Tafer, Thimothée Kolodziecziak, Alexandre Lacazette

Cameroon (vs. Togo – 10/10/09, vs. Angola – 10/14/09): Jean II Makoun

Sweden (vs. Denmark – 10/10/09, vs. Albania – 10/14/09): Kim Kallstrom

Bosnia (vs. Estonia – 10/10/09, vs. Spain – 10/14/09): Miralem Pjanic

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On to the good news. OL Féminines, who are participating in Europe for the third year in a row, defeated Serbian club Masinac to reach the Round of 16 in the UEFA Women’s Champions League. The ladies defeated Masinac 1-0 at home and then beat them 5-0 away (check out this link on the main webpage for lots of pictures). They’ll be facing Danish side Fortuna Hjørring in the next round. For those of you who keep track of women’s football, UEFA overhauled this tournament, renaming it from the previous moniker, the Women’s Cup, and also changing around the format so that it was closer to the men’s format.

I’m also pleased to report that Aulas continues to take OL Féminines seriously – not only is he still continuing to let them use the Stade de Gerland for their European and major domestic matches, but he’s continuing his policy of aggressive recruiting and extensive financial support. Many of the women are now on pro-contract, and he’s trying to lure in more players from abroad. The latest target is Kolbotn’s goalkeeper and Norweigian international Christine Colombo Nilsen, who is being considered to replace Sarah Bouhaddi, France’s #1 gk. Bouhaddi herself was brought on this past summer (ironically to replace Bente Nordby, Norway’s previous #1), but due to an injury she picked up, she’ll be out for six months.

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The FFF had a great article on its website about the long standing friendship between Yannis Tafer and Clement Grenier, two of the youth players Puel is integrating into the senior squad. The article provides a nice look into their experiences and insights of growing up together in Lyon’s training center. Reading it, I got the feeling that these two are being groomed as the next Karim Benzema/Hatem Ben Arfa duo, which would be great on one hand, but on the other hand (all that ~dramah~), maybe it’d be better to let the boys grow up without the shadows of their currently troubled predecessors looming over them.

*Bonus question: Who is the next Samir Nasri to complete the latest golden trio?

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And since we’re on the subject of young prodigies, I’m sure you’ve all heard by now of Karim Benzema’s now famous interview in which he admitted to not trying very hard for both France and Lyon. He also blamed Claude Puel as the reason for his leaving (yeah right). Raymond Domenech is pissed while Jean-mimi is patting himself on the back for getting rid of Benzema before his megalomania began taking serious effect – and for 35 million euros, no less.

I’m rather sad about Benzema’s words because until last season, he was such a hard working and humble kid. He loved OL, and we loved him. But the press and stardom got to him, and pretty soon he was thinking that he was bigger than the club. Regardless of that, I was still upset to see him leave this past summer, but it looks like Lyon’s strategy of cutting loose players has once again worked out. Because for all of Benzema’s talents, his attitude would have further poisoned the atmosphere among the players, and no amount of goals would make that worthwhile (plus, it’s not like Benzema was all that great last season anyway). It was time for him to leave and time for OL to lose their dependence on him.

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Hugo Lloris has been voted September’s Player of the Month by the L’Union Nationale des Footballeurs Professionnels (UNFP). Lloris beat out team mate Bafetimbi Gomis and Bordeaux’s Alou Diarra. I don’t think there’s anyone out there who can say that Lloris doesn’t deserve it – he’s been the best player in L1 this past month, and his performances in the Champions League have been equally impressive. Despite picking up a harsh red card against Serbia during France’s WC qualifiers this past month, he still remains an integral part of Domenech’s plans, and most expect him to continue being the first gk choice over Steve Mandanda.

Buttttttttt…

I happened to watch Lloris’s latest interview on the FFF website, and wow, that was cringe-worthy. Somehow, he’s managed to pick up Jeremy Toulalan’s bad camera habits. The poor boy can’t stop touching his face (nor can he look into the camera) during his less than three minute interview. The entire time I was watching it, I was having nightmare flashbacks to this video. You all know how much I adore both Lloris and Toulalan, but really, someone needs to tie their hands down and keep their eyes up any time they give an interview.

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Lyon’s new stadium, which still hasn’t left the drawing board yet, has been officially selected by France’s Euro 2016 committee as one of the 12 sites for the games. While France hasn’t officially been named as hosts, their competitors are Sweden/Norway, Turkey, and Italy. The first two have never hosted the Euros while Italy’s financial situation is rather dire at the moment, which makes France the favorites.

Aulas is hoping to get the final plans approved, though the stadium being selected as part of the tournament will no doubt speed the process along. The costs have jumped up another one hundred million, raising the estimated costs to 350 million euros. In addition, Aulas is working with the city to address the issue of accessibility to the new stadium site, which is the biggest concern among those opposed to the project.

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And to cap off this massive post, here are the latest transfer fallacies blurbs.

*Inter Milan is keeping tabs on Jeremy Toulalan and may make a move for him either this January or the next summer. They need to replace their aging DMs, and France has proved to be the best source of those. While I’m tempted to brush this off, I worry over how long we’ll be able to keep Toulalan, who said that he has no plans to leave any time soon and definitely not until after the World Cup. Personally, he’s one of the players I want to keep at OL for life, and so hopefully Aulas will do whatever it takes to keep Toulalan at Lyon.

*At least Ederson has denied that he’s tempted by the cow eyes that Inter has also been making at him, though unlike Toulalan, I don’t anticipate Ederson to stay at OL for more than another two years or so. For now, Ederson is happy at OL (though he is chafing at losing his starting place), but Inter have been following him for over a season, and Jose Mourinho is no stranger when it comes to buying expensive players from OL.

*Manchester City’s interest in Miralem Pjanic gave me a good laugh. If Pjanic leaves, it won’t be for a while and not for Manchester City. And DEFINITELY not for 5 million pounds.

*Marouane Chamakh has finally put an end to rumors of a potential move to Lyon. In all honesty, this hasn’t been a serious option for the past few years, but Aulas really likes him and has wanted him at OL for a long time. But Chamakh says that while a transfer to OL was enticing a a few seasons back, he can’t imagine playing for another French club anymore, so when he does leave Bordeaux, it’ll be for a club abroad.

*While this isn’t exactly a transfer rumor, Mathieu Bodmer said recently that he doesn’t regret changing positions from midfield to central defense. It’s a fairly lengthy interview full of details, but the salient points are that he gets more playing time as a CB and that his bust up with Puel (which occurred before he left Lille, a full year before Puel followed him to Lyon) is old history, and that the two have a completely professional relationship. Which basically means that Puel is on the bottom of his Christmas card list. But at least Bodmer isn’t trying to move to another club, which is often the case when players are forced to play in positions they don’t really like.

Source: Lyon’s official website (I’m serious).

I thought we should do our version of goal.com’s article, maybe they’ve pulled-it. Anyway, although I thought that the author got a couple of things right in his article, he was, IMO, shooting too low. Now that JMA has renewed my confidence in OL’s possibly getting serious this mercato, lets see what we can come-up with, that while being slightly more ambitious than goal, is still realistic. Remember, I’m not talking about bringing in Vidic and Evra, let’s keep it realistic.

Lloris
Clerc-Cris-Boumsong-Morel
Govou/Remy-Toulalan-Makoun-Drenthe/Mancini
Perez/Erding-Benzema

Left Back: I’m really banging my head as to who else to include in the left back category, but for now, My choice is Jeremy Morel of Lorient. He’s put in some fine performances this year, and he woudln’t break the bank either. Only downside: lack of big game experience. Would be nice to have Drenthe or some more experienced player as a back-up or even starter in more important CL games.

LMF/LW:

Amantino Mancini: If Mancini is let go by Inter at 10 mill or under, his acquisition is a must. Hopefully his loss of form is just due to lack of playing time in Mourinho’s squad and he can regain his Roma form in no time. His “polyvalence”-aside from his abundant tactical skills- make him a real prize being able to slide into LMF/LWF, AMF as well as his more natural RMF/RWF role.

Royston Drenthe: Would fullfill our needs all along the left-hand side, even providing a back-up left back. If his reported price tag is really 13mill, then that’s a steal for the potential upside that this talent can bring to the club.

Strikers:

Loic Remy: If it’s true that management didn’t include a buy-back clause in Remy’s sale contract, then that has to be one of the most bone-headed moves in their history; what a lack of foresight. And another thing I don’t get is how are they still willing to sell Anthony Mounier to Nice if they are so insistant that they will not sell Remy back- unless it’s a ploy to drive-up his price of course. Anyway, like Mancini, Remy could fill alot of holes: he could fill-in on the left and right when Govou’s out, partner at starting striker next to Karim in a 4-4-2, or give us a #2/#3 back-up option at CF if another striker is brought in.

Melvut Erding: At 10mill, he’s a a less expensive option with plenty of potential. He could pair up with Benz or be a potent #2 option.

Lisandro Lopez: No need to say much. He’s a prolific world class striker, who will pair-up with Karim, wreak havoc on defenses, and ease the pain of Benz’s departure in the near future.

I didn’t include most of Real’s Dutch exodus, because most of their salaries are prohibitive. Also, don’t forget to leave your opinions regarding potential left backs.

Oh, Ronan, if ever there was a post for you, this is it buddy.

This is kind of a cheesy post, but since news about Lyon is so scant these days(All I really care about are matches and transfer gossip anyway), I thought I’d break the midweek paucity of posts as of late with a question. I saw this article on goal.com last week, and it rates the best OL players this season i.e., who the author thought was the best/were the best player/s this season.
Anyway, I didn’t have time, nor do I really know how to put together a formal poll, so I thought I’d just get the ball rolling and let you guys hash-it-out in the comments section. I know there are still several fixture to go before the end of the season and this may seem premature, but judging by the way Lyon’s been playing lately, I doubt that any single player will do anything so spectacular in the final stretch- please someone prove me wrong- that will make you change your minds from now until the final fixture. So.. the question: Who are your top five most valuable players- if you have that many- and why?

And I just love farmer!Toulalan. I’ve completely changed my mind about that, and you can be sure that his face will be next to my desk year round, no matter what month it is (though I still have yet to embrace his taste in music).

The following images are what I scanned from my calendar. I’ve never used my photo scanner until this weekend and still haven’t figured out what all the buttons are for, so I apologize for the fact that the coloring is weird in some of the pics.

JANUARY – EDERSON

(click to resize)

JANUARY – CRIS

FEBRUARY – REVEILLERE

FEBRUARY – VERCOUTRE

MARCH – JUNINHO

MARCH – FABIO SANTOS

APRIL – GOVOU

APRIL – GROSSO

MAY – LLORIS

MAY – CLERC

JUNE – BENZEMA

JUNE – KEITA

JULY – BOUMSONG

JULY – DELGAGO

AUGUST – FRED

AUGUST – PIQUIONNE

SEPTEMBER – GRENIER, TAFER, KOLODZIEJCZAK

SEPTEMBER – KALLSTROM

OCTOBER – MAKOUN

OCTOBER – TOULALAN

NOVEMBER – PJANIC

NOVEMBER – MOUNIER, HARTOCK

DECEMBER – MENSAH

DECEMBER – BODMER

OL Replay is a virtual way for fans to relive all the goals from Lyon games. It’s sort of a cross between reality and a video game. The interesting thing is that you can choose from what angle you’d like to see the goal and from the viewpoint of any player in the nearby vicinity. For example, I decided to replay Karim Benzema’s goal from this weekend’s match against Le Mans, except I watched the goals as if I were Fred , Mathieu Coutadeur, and then the referee. Then for kicks, I pretended to be Yohann Pele.

So far, I haven’t figured out the point behind OL Replay, since until now, normal video replays were working just fine, but it’s an interesting way to spend thirty minutes that you could be using to do something else more productive. You need to have Macromedia Shockwave installed on your computer (though most of you probably already have it), and depending on your processor’s speed, it may take awhile to load. It’s also all in French, but it’s pretty easy to figure out. The application was just made available today, which is why a handful of goals haven’t been added yet, and so far, only Lyon goals are available. I’m guessing in the future, conceded goals will be available too (though that might prove to be too painful to watch).

If you’re like me, you might be wondering why Lyon are suddenly becoming so technologically fancy on their website. Last year, they came out with their super detailed Statistics Center, which documents every single move made by every single player during every single Lyon game. This application is also really handy if you wanted to find out which players are mad at each other. For example, you can find out what the passing rate was between Karim Benzema and Hatem Ben Arfa during specific games.

Now all Lyon need to do is come out with an online virtual community, something like The Sims: Olympique Lyonnais Edition. I would totally buy it, make an Inara avatar, become a certain midfielder’s WAG, and then spend his (virtual) money. Sounds fun, right?

Coming off the set of The Sound of Music.

Benzema is pleased, but Keita would rather be someplace else.

Sonny and Makoun are going for the celebrity couple look.

It’s frightening how good these two look together.

But Toulalan has no one to hold his hand.

*weeps for him while also surreptitiously volunteering*

(Photos courtesy of Blog de Olympique-Lyonnais-H-P)